GLUMP Products & Accessories

Choose from a wide variety of Glumps at unbeatable prices.     View Glump Accessories

Glump Classic
Glump Classic gives you a source of meanness without any of the side affects of our enhanced versions of Glump. This Glump has been time tested and survived many years in a world where kindness rules supreme.

  • Tute-Screw
  • A Cold One
  • Discontinued

    Nuclear Glump
    Nuclear Glump gives you the joy of Glump without the need of feeding.

  • 50-year nuclear power supply
  • Built-In Microwave
  • Cooling Tower
  • Nuclear Radiation Suit
  • $800.00

    Safari Glump
    For consumers that live in rural areas or goes on many outdoor excursions.

  • Wilderness survival skills
  • First Aid & CPR certified
  • Cool Tan Hat
  • $650.99

    Iranian Glump
    This Glump is useful for anyone involved in a holy war. Also can be used in peaceful households that are of Hindu or Islam faith.

  • Self-Destruction mechanism
          (in case Glump is captured by infidels)
  • Knowledge in guerrilla warfare and terrorist tactics
  • Fluent in Arabic and Broken English
  • Nifty White Turban
  • $650.00

    GI JOE Glump
    For consumers with the need for protection without the need for a gun license. Also useful for school districts is programs such as DARE.

  • M16A2 assault rifle and special military gun license
  • 100 rounds of special Mean Ammunition
  • Knowledge of military tactics
  • Camouflage outfit and backpack
  • $650.00

    Pirate Glump
    Pirate Glump is specially designed for our seafaring consumers.

  • Sea Navigation and Sailing knowledge
  • Fluent in pirate speak and the pirate code
  • Pirate Garb including a bandana and eye patch
  • $650.00

    Hacker Glump
    Designed for lonely computer geeks to have a gaming/coding companion. Also bought by parents to watch over their computer geek child.

  • Extensive knowledge of every Windows operating system
  • Typing speed of 120 words per minute
  • Weighs only 100 lbs
  • Matrix type sunglasses
  • $599.99

    Glump Accessories:

    Glump Toothbrush
    Glumps do not have the manual dexterity to operate a normal toothbrush. A must have for any Glump owner.
    (These brushes should be replaced every 3 to 4 months.)

    Glump Clothing
    Specially designed to fit a Glump and 100% cotton. This way your Glump doesn't have to wear the same thing every day.

    Nuclear Radiation Suit
    Radiation suits are useful for families with Nuclear Glump. Comes in both adult and kids sizes.

    Nice Spray
    Nice Spray is the easiest and most humane way to punish your Glump. [View Image]

    Mean Ammunition
    Ammunition with an extra punch.

    A temple is a small building where Iranian Glump can worship in peace.

    A more economical version of the Glump Temple is the Alter. Fits in a corner of at least a 10' X 10' room.